Never the Same

One of the parts of grieving that most people are afraid to discuss is the fact that nothing is ever going to be the same as the “before”  It’s a primary  and clear demarcation, the “before” and the “after” that everyone faces during grief. 

An excerpt from my book, “Leaning into Grief, Words of Experience and Healing Poems”,

Chapter: Will I Ever Be the Same?

“You know, right here and right now, all the new normal stuff is real.  My life wasn't going to be the same, and my life will never be the same again. Ever.  But, the stages, well, I was told five stages of grief.  Come on, how about 105 stages of grief!  At least for me.

That’s the point. It is simply not the same stages, same order, same number same anything for any two people!

And, yes, not being able to focus did stop, but this is what no one tells you.  You can be in the middle of a store six months later, and suddenly, you're losing your breath, you can't focus, and you begin to cry.  The stages, the events come and go.  Physically, the exhaustion and the inability to function sometimes have no warning or reason.”

Not the Same

The mirror tells me

I’m the same.

Everyone greets me,

the same way.

My dog snuggles with me

the same way.

My heart tells me,

I am not the same.

The confusion and pain

make me feel disconnected.

The empty spot in my days

and my nights say:

No, you are not the same person,

with the same life.

And never again will you be the same.

Where did I go?

I’m not here,

I’m not there,

With him.

Only alone and not the same.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/1661943926